It's 3:30 on Tuesday, the baby hasn't been sleeping well, not overnight nor for naps. He's teething for what feels like the fifth week in a row and I am tired... like exhausted. There's a pile of dirty laundry on my bedroom floor, a sink full of dishes in my kitchen and I promised myself I would vacuum today, after I workout, after I finish loading Crew's 6 month pictures since he's now almost 9 months. Thank goodness for crock pots, pre-made spaghetti sauce and noodles.
As I sit here trying to soothe an irritable baby while reminding myself for the tenth time of all that I have left to do today I catch myself. Thank goodness I caught myself. I was reminded of a message that Pastor Louie Giglio preached last week. He taught me about moments just like this one. When I feel overwhelmed, under appreciated and tired. "Don't give the enemy a seat at your table." That's exactly what I was doing just a minute ago. As I let myself get caught up in the whirlwind of life whether it be life inside or outside of our home, as I let chores and emotions get the best of me, the enemy was slowly, silently pulling a seat up at my table.
I almost didn't catch him. I started to think how I should be a better mother, wife, daughter, homemaker. Why do I always have such a mess around me? Why can't I manage my time better? Why is my baby so upset? My friend's baby is always happy aka instagram! Can I get an Amen! You see, that talk right there is the enemy. He pulled up a chair and started whispering these things to me. He will encourage that kind of talk and he will keep pushing and prodding and showing me all that I am not until I find myself in a pit of self pity, denial and despair.
Not today! I caught him and I took my seat back because that seat is taken. Today, in this moment, in the middle of my mess and chores and even with the sound of crying from my teething baby I am choosing to listen to my Father. My God tells me that I am beautiful, strong, courageous and determined. So I took a minute, said a little prayer, turned on some music and kept moving and today I took a little step in the right direction. Instead of getting caught up in the hustle and bustle, my emotions and stresses, I chose to lean on my Father and He gave me strength and revival in my own home and my heart.